Tag: #hopeful

Thousands to share…

On By journeyofenoughLeave a comment

When my friend and I get together, it’s quite the opposite of the “5 loaves and 3 fishes” story. We always over-do food. Not sure why but we both do, so when we are together, we could easily add a few more people and still have plenty. For many years, we have gotten together to do our Christmas baking. We aren’t even sure how it started. Likely it was while we were on a walk one time when we were still neighbors. I’m guessing we got to talking about holiday baking & thought that since we both liked to bake, it would be a great way to do it together. We would try to get together once a month for a group meal. Maybe we talked about it then. Not sure. It all started with her bringing over her baking supplies and using our double oven to make the baking go faster. Of course there were lists involved (who made which one and how much). We each picked our favorites to make. Eventually we found some new ones and got rid of some others.

We made a full day of it each year. Our husbands were in charge of dishes, packaging & the babies. Now our kids are much older and we don’t need the pack & play or diaper bags. The year I was diagnosed with cancer, we still baked. We made an extra batch of everything & took it to a neighbor who was also battling cancer. I was still numb from my diagnosis- still not sure what path my treatment would take. Baking has always been like therapy to me. Not sure why, I just love it. Last year we didn’t do baking day. We had moved into a rental and things were crazy. Between the two of us, we didn’t have a good weekend to do it and my double oven was gone. When we were cleaning out our old house, I cried when I saw sprinkles under the stove – so many memories of baking in that house.

So, this year, we took baking day “on the road.” Her friend wanted to join too, so this time, I packed up 1/2 of my kitchen and hauled it to West Fargo. We spent 4 hrs the night before having some wine & just doing “a few things.” Sunday was Game Day! It was an 8am start, and when we left at 5, they were still doing their cut out cookies. After seeing the pictures on Facebook, several people asked if we were doing a bake sale. It’s not why we made that much, but I am taking some of mine to a bake sale at work. We do a fundraiser for Relay for Life. Usually, we give most of it away. We like to eat some of course, but we mainly just love to share it. Several years, we have packed up a bunch to take to the homeless shelter. We give it to teachers and neighbors & co-workers. The fun is in the laughs that we have while we do it. It’s an all-day, 12-14 hr marathon. Our feet are sore, but our freezers are full and we have plenty to share. Her husband likes to keep track of numbers. Final count was 3500 treats, aside from our separate cut outs and the puff corn & reindeer chow.

I ended up sick but it wasn’t from eating too many sweets. Just a bug. Or God’s way of slowing me down. Or maybe I’m getting too old for this. Regardless, the treats were all divided into 3 groups by our packaging department & will be shared throughout December.

Whatever your talent, be sure to share it. This time of year is a great time to reach out to a neighbor or volunteer somewhere. May your journey of enough contain enough sugar for your cookies, enough music for you to sing along and enough laughter to make the time fly. I’m thankful to have had all of that and more yesterday.

Are you resisting the good?

On By journeyofenough1 Comment

This photo came up on my Facebook feed today. I remember this day. Our youngest son was 4. He was not a fan of Santa. Each year, we went to Santa Village in Fargo. It was an old farm that was made into a “park” for the Fargo Park District. Every year for Christmas, they set up a model train in the barn, made crafts, decorated cookies with Mrs.Claus, saw the reindeer, wrote letters to Santa and got to visit with him. The visiting part didn’t always go well. Some years, we had to wait in a long line to visit with Santa. He always wore over-all’s since he was at the farm. He wasn’t in his red suit until Christmas, of course. He had white hair and glasses and was soft spoken.

Myles was not a fan of any kind of mascots or life size cartoon characters & he wasn’t a fan of Santa. You can see my husband laughing hysterically & our other son with a big grin like “I’m getting his presents too!” We went back later and tried again. This time, he sat on his lap and even gave him a hug.

It made me think – how many times do we resist something good just because it’s scary. Have you ever passed up an opportunity because you didn’t want to go outside your comfort zone? Have you ever stayed away from someone unfamiliar? What if they were like Santa? A little scary at first, but really kind hearted. What if there was a great gift waiting for you but you were too stuck in your ways to check it out? Next time you encounter an opportunity, think of Santa. Just maybe don’t scream or cry like our son did.

Peace be with you on your journey of enough. Ho ho ho.

Drop the hiking pack…

On By journeyofenough1 Comment

I took this picture after dropping my son off at school. What a beautiful sunrise. (I added the words to make it more “artsy”) But, it got me thinking – how many days do we drag yesterday with us instead of starting over. Have you seen the movie “50 First dates?” Adam Sandler falls in love with Drew Barrymore, but she has short term memory loss. She forgets yesterday & starts over each day. I wouldn’t want to forget yesterday, but maybe I don’t need to hold onto it so much. You’ve heard people say they have “emotional baggage.” To me, that brings up a powerful mental image. The heavy baggage of yesterday that we carry around…We dwell on it. We let it define us. We let it hold us down & keep us from moving forward.

Have you ever pictured it? Have you pictured getting rid of it? Have you seen yourself lifting it off your shoulders like one of those giant hiking backpacks? Give it a try. Picture yourself taking off that burden. Release that fear, that anger, that guilt, that doubt. You don’t need to carry it with you. It does not need to define you. It may have shaped who you are, but it doesn’t need to weigh you down and keep you from discovering something new about yourself.

You might not want to get rid of your big hiking pack. I get it, it’s comfortable & safe. It feels like something you’re supposed to have on, to carry around and to keep you from running too far or trying something too crazy. Ok, so what if you took baby steps & took a few things out of your pack to start with? Maybe you’re not ready to kick it down the street just yet. What if you wrote down something from that backpack & then tossed it away? We did this at a retreat & it was a powerful experience. Toss it. Got rid of it. Throw it in the fire or into the garbage. You don’t need it anymore. You don’t need it to define you. Fill yourself up with some laughs. Let that laughter take the spot of whatever you took out of that pack. See how much lighter the laughter is? It’s bound to make you smile too.

Peace be with you on your journey of enough. I wish you peace that you will find from the release of your baggage. Fill it up with enough love to keep you warm, enough laughter to keep you light & enough hope to keep you moving forward.

When no news is good news …

On By journeyofenoughLeave a comment

My Halloween mammogram results were mailed to me. I am so thankful that I didn’t get a call. I knew that if there was something suspicious they would have called in 1-2 days. So delighted to see this in the mail today. 

My results were “normal.” Hallelujah! There were 3 ladies named Mavis getting mammograms on Tuesday. What are the odds of that?! I take it as a sign that I was supported.  I felt the love and support of everyone who said they would hold my hand through it. 

If you are a lady & haven’t had a mammogram yet this year, please do so. It could literally save your life!! (Men get breast cancer also but I’m not sure about insurance coverage for men) When you do, I hope you hear no news and get a letter instead of a call. Thank your technician because they also helped. Tell someone you trust that you’re going so they can pray with you. One year, my best friend came with me and we had lunch and drinks before hand.

Peace be with you on your journey of enough. 

Hibernation…

On By journeyofenoughLeave a comment

It’s opening deer season in MN tomorrow and everyone is excited about getting out and hunting. Except me. I’m excited for my husband & son, but I won’t be sitting in a deer stand myself. I’m more of an “inside girl” in the winter. I try to ski and liked snowshoeing, but I still don’t love winter. Yep, I’m aware of where I live… winter is inevitable. It’s been in the 30’s for several days, and while that makes my son super excited that “ice will be forming on the lakes,” I just want to crawl into my hot coffee & eat all of my Halloween candy. It’s been super cold at work so I’ve had layers on. (Not as cold as my old job where I had a heater and fingerless gloves like from The Breakfast Club movie.) It’s cold enough that I crank it up to “nursing home hot” when I get home.

Hiding. Hibernation. Isolation. It’s easier to do here when it’s cold. It’s easier to get stuck inside under a cozy blanket and nap away the winter. But that’s not what we are called to do. We are called to connect with others, to support each other and to experience our lives. Remember how I told you that I joined a Connect Group at church? Connection. Why are we so scared of it? I met with two strangers and they didn’t laugh at me or call me nuts. We all have our own version of crazy, so we shouldn’t hide ourselves away just for fear of rejection. I went to a retreat last weekend with 18 other ladies I had never met. Me. An introvert. Guess what? It was great! It was amazing and it was fun. Connection. We all crave it whether we admit it or not. I cried and laughed with 18 strangers and made 18 new friends. I opened up my small circle to let people in. They didn’t run away. They hugged me instead. They cried with me and laughed with me. 

Even though I feel like a momma bear some days, I’m not meant to hibernate. Neither are you. I challenge you to let someone new get to know you. The real you, the authentic you. May your journey of enough include some new paths, new friends and new experiences. Life is short, go live it! 

Peace be with you!

Hibernation…

On By journeyofenoughLeave a comment

It’s opening deer season in MN tomorrow and everyone is excited about getting out and hunting. Except me. I’m excited for my husband & son, but I won’t be sitting in a deer stand myself. I’m more of an “inside girl” in the winter. I try to ski and liked snowshoeing, but I still don’t love winter. Yep, I’m aware of where I live… winter is inevitable. It’s been in the 30’s for several days, and while that makes my son super excited that “ice will be forming on the lakes,” I just want to crawl into my hot coffee & eat all of my Halloween candy. It’s been super cold at work so I’ve had layers on. (Not as cold as my old job where I had a heater and fingerless gloves like from The Breakfast Club movie.) It’s cold enough that I crank it up to “nursing home hot” when I get home.

Hiding. Hibernation. Isolation. It’s easier to do here when it’s cold. It’s easier to get stuck inside under a cozy blanket and nap away the winter. But that’s not what we are called to do. We are called to connect with others, to support each other and to experience our lives. Remember how I told you that I joined a Connect Group at church? Connection. Why are we so scared of it? I met with two strangers and they didn’t laugh at me or call me nuts. We all have our own version of crazy, so we shouldn’t hide ourselves away just for fear of rejection. I went to a retreat last weekend with 18 other ladies I had never met. Me. An introvert. Guess what? It was great! It was amazing and it was fun. Connection. We all crave it whether we admit it or not. I cried and laughed with 18 strangers and made 18 new friends. I opened up my small circle to let people in. They didn’t run away. They hugged me instead. They cried with me and laughed with me. 

Even though I feel like a momma bear some days, I’m not meant to hibernate. Neither are you. I challenge you to let someone new get to know you. The real you, the authentic you. May your journey of enough include some new paths, new friends and new experiences. Life is short, go live it! 

Peace be with you!

Experiment of One Word…

On By journeyofenoughLeave a comment

One word. I was a part of a group/class and one of our assignments was to ask on social media: “describe me in 1 word.” We could not say why or respond with anything other than “thank you.” This felt strange. It felt like I was fishing for compliments and laying my heart out. The most amazing thing happened: I got practice accepting a compliment. Instead of brushing it off or adding a “but…” – all I did was reply thank you. It’s harder to do than you think. How many times does someone compliment you and you add a “thanks, BUT I got it on sale” or some other comment that tends to diminish their compliment? Try it out. If someone compliments you, just say thank you, and smile. Soak up the positive energy & spread it around to someone else. 

Another great thing happened… I now have a whole list of words to describe myself. Instead of the negative comments that sometimes float around in my head, I have a whole list of great words. I heard from people I wouldn’t have expected a comment from. I heard responses I wasn’t anticipating. They all remind me of who I am to others & who I should be to myself. I typed them all out in different fonts and  fun colors and hung it in my room. I haven’t been brave enough to hang it at work yet. One word came up twice and made me teary… Enough. Oh, yes! Enough! What a great reminder. 

Given the recent tragic shooting in Las Vegas, it made me think of this “one word.” It doesn’t cost anything to give people a compliment. It’s free to give people a new word to describe themselves. What if you could make someone’s day? What if you could lift them up when they are down? What if you could make them feel loved? You can. Oh precious soul, you do have the power to make someone else feel enough. Or beautiful… or inspirational… or talented. We don’t know how long we have on this earth. Don’t leave those good words unsaid. I challenge you to tell someone what they mean to you. Give them a new positive word. 

Peace be with you on your journey of enough. I’d love to hear what your one word is.

Hold my hand…

On By journeyofenoughLeave a comment

“Fine.” That’s what most people say when you ask, “How are you doing?” Most people are also liars when it comes to this question, but we still ask just to be nice, or fill an awkward silence or make us think that by asking we are somehow better connected. They talked about it at church last night. The pastor talked about people coming to church to feel a sense of community, but not being willing to get past the “fine.”  I get it. I’m there with you. It’s scary. It’s scary to open up to someone else and/or someone new. What if they look at you funny? What if they avoid you next time? What if they laugh, think you’re crazy or tell their friends to avoid you? But what if they care? What if, by opening up, you make a new friend or a new connection? What if you are the listening ear that someone else needs & you make their day? (By the way, you may never know or realize that this happens… people don’t always come back saying, “thanks for listening or caring.”)

So, here I am… being vulnerable… asking for you to hold my hand. (Virtually, of course.) I have my “routine” mammogram tomorrow (Friday) now changed to Monday 10/23. It comes 6 months after the MRI. This is the schedule for a while, after finding breast cancer on my left side. It still makes me nervous. It still takes my breath away. It still makes me feel like an actual elephant is sitting on my chest. I was thinking it would be later in October, but they had an opening this week, and it worked into the schedule. It’s for the best that I didn’t have 25 days to think about it. I only had 2. (I literally wrote this post at noon and they called me to change it to Oct 23rd, so I DO have 25 days to wait. I guess this gives me extra time for prayers.) This will be my first one at the clinic in town instead of driving back to Fargo.  I can do this. It’s quick, it’s not super painful and it’s necessary. I know God’s in control of this, but I can’t help wonder what is up his sleeve for me. I hope it’s to live a long life, see my kids grow & marry, and have families of their own. We aren’t guaranteed that… but that’s my hope. 

I learned to pray more intentionally after several significant life events. So here is my request: Imagine you are holding my hand on October 23rd. I may squeeze your hand when they press the machine down. The scar tissue is still tender. I may shed a tear because I’m just so thankful to be alive. Pray specifically for peace… for a sense of calm to wash over me. Pray for a good, clear scan. Pray for quick results & good news. Then, go hug someone. If you are a female, schedule your damn mammogram. Just do it. I don’t care what size or shape you are… just make the appointment. And when you do, you can message me to pray for you and I promise I will. 

Peace be with you on your journey of enough. May you have enough courage to open up and let people in. May you have enough faith to get you through tough times. May you have enough friends to hold your hand so that you don’t even notice the mammogram machine smush.

Better Connected

On By journeyofenoughLeave a comment

 

I looked in the mirror after the church service Wednesday night, looking for grey hair. When did I become a grumpy old church lady? Do you know what I’m talking about? We had some sweet grey haired ladies in our Lutheran church growing up. They sure would give you a “look” if your kids were misbehaving. As our pastor talked, people talked amongst themselves… loudly. Not just kids, but adults too… talking without respect for the pastor. Their conversation was much more important than whatever he was saying about the new Confirmission year (confirmation + mission). I felt myself being annoyed and wondering what the pastor was feeling. I certainly was grumpy about it but I didn’t make any “church lady glances.”

Our church has a “theme” each year. Last year, it was Church in the Wild. It focused on getting out into the community to share our faith. This year, the theme is Better Connected. They bring in a guest speaker every so often. That night it was a youth pastor who spoke of being called out of our comfort zone. When he spoke, those side conversations stopped. Everyone was paying attention. (Thank goodness) This topic was perfect for me. Although I’m no longer considered a youth, the idea of being better connected with strangers is certainly out of my comfort zone. As part of the Better Connected theme, they are starting small groups. Ugh small groups? Will there be “ice breakers” also? Normally, I’d pretend that I didn’t see the sign up sheet, come up with an excuse not to do it, or avoid everyone who tried to ask me about it. In the spirit of trying new things, I signed up. Aaahh. Can you believe this?! Add this to the list of things I never thought I’d do. Oh and while I was at it, last week I also went to a Parents Advisory Council (kinda like PTA) at Myles’ school. 

Why, oh why am I doing these things? Modeling. No, not in the sense of fashion (for sure that’s not me)… in the sense of modeling for my kids. To show them that it’s ok to step outside your comfort zone. It’s ok to try new things. It’s ok to open up and let people in. Scary? Hell, yes. But, I felt that tap on my shoulder to do this. I’m excited to see what will come of it. If I don’t try, I will never know. 

My journey of enough is taking me on a different path. A path that I never thought I’d go down. It’s safe and comfortable to stay with what you know… but what if something great comes out of the new path? What if I inspire my kids or make a new friend? I’ll keep you posted on how this all shakes out. Maybe you’ll feel compelled to try something new too. Maybe you’ll find your new favorite hobby or wine or friend. 

Peace be with you on your journey of enough. Hang on and enjoy the ride!

Stand by me…

On By journeyofenough1 Comment

Are you sitting down? Stand up. It’s ok, I’ll wait… Stand up. How long did it take you? If you are able bodied, it took you a few seconds maybe? How many times do you do that in a day? Ever think about it? Ever give thanks for it? We did, 3 years ago. 

My brother-in-law had been in a farm accident, where a tractor drove over his back. He had broken ribs and needed a plate put in to hold his pelvis together. He spent weeks in the hospital recovering, and even longer in a wheel chair. He needed time to heal without walking. Then the OK came… “You can try to stand.” I can’t imagine how scary and exciting and overwhelming that must have been. Can you imagine the faith that took? The faith that the doctors knew what they were doing? The faith that God had pulled you through? The faith that your family would be there if you fell? He stood with a walker, and we all cheered!

The thought of that “anniversary” yesterday made me cry. Thankful, overwhelmed tears, even after 3 years. There is so much that we take for granted each day… walking,  seeing, talking. We forget to be thankful for the small things until something happens to make them more difficult. He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. Isaiah 40:29. There is no doubt in my mind that God gave him strength to stand. God continues to give him strength, as he does to all of us…Strength to overcome obstacles we never thought we’d win. 

When things go wrong, or seem out of control, we are more likely to cry out for help. But, just today, stand up – and then whisper, “thank you.” Make a list of all of the things you are thankful for – big or small. Then do the same thing tomorrow. If you focus on the good, more good will come.  When you feel like you’re not enough, remember that God is standing beside you. To Him, you are always enough. 

Peace be with you on your journey of enough.