“the condition or fact of being favored by someone”
synonyms: favor, approval, approbation, acceptance, esteem, regard, respect; goodwill
Grace. There are at least 5 different meanings when I look it up. I felt it the other night. We were at church for confirmation & the parents go to a small group while the kids are in their own group. It’s led by a lady who is trained in the “Nurtured Heart” approach. Our previous school did lots of things with this. My husband had gone to training in it also. She talked about how we need to give our kids a safe place. We shouldn’t be hard on them or freak out at them. Some parents talked about their kids being perfectionists. I said that I just wanted mine to care more so I didn’t have to hound him to do homework. I sat with my arms crossed, feeling like a failure. I’m sure my body language was obvious.
I yell. I hound. I curse (out loud & in my head… not out loud at church of course). After the parent session was over, I grumbled in my head and met Dallas to go home. In the car, we talked about what our groups were doing. “What are they doing in your group, Mom?” My summary was less than stellar (apologies to the church people who may read this). “We talked about the Nurtured Heart.” He asked what it was. “Well, I’m not supposed to freak out at you, so I’m feeling like a $@&y mom.” His voice sounded surprised. “You’re not a crappy mom, you’re a great mom.” I told him how I felt bad for hounding him to do homework & turn stuff in. He said that it was ok, & he actually appreciates it because sometimes he forgets.
9th grade in a new, big school is overwhelming. I guess it’s ok for your mom to remind you to turn in your stuff. If I hadn’t talked about this, I would have gone home, playing that crappy Mom scenario over and over in my head. I would have made up a whole story that was negative and self-hating. Instead, I asked and he gave me grace.
Fast forward to parent teacher conferences last night… there were some assignments that still weren’t turned in. While talking with the teachers, they were more than willing to let him turn the work in still. Grace. Because he asked. Because he cared.
Grace. I’ve seen the word pop up a number of times in the last week. I started writing and then stopped. Put my blog post in “draft” mode and waited. But it appeared again and today, so someone needs to hear about Grace. To me, it means acceptance, forgiveness & love. I need to show it to my son more. I need to show it to myself more. I’m guessing you need it too. We all do.
Peace be with you on your journey of enough. May you keep your hearts open to give grace & accept grace along the way.