Judging a book…

“Don’t judge a book by the cover.” You’ve likely heard the saying before. Usually it applies to people – don’t judge the outside of the person when you don’t know what they’re really like. If I’m honest, sometimes I find myself judging anyway, even though I try not to. One example is marathons or running events. I would find myself making an assumption about someone based on what gear they were wearing, who they were with and where they were in the pack. I was almost always wrong. Expensive gear doesn’t make you faster. Age doesn’t make a difference in many cases. Maybe I was being more curious than judgmental. Curious about their training, their story, what brought them to this place, what their drive and determination… yes, that sounds more like curiosity instead of judgement. (If you haven’t seen Ted Lasso, it’s worth watching)

Actually judging a book by the cover is a different thing. What draws you to pick up a book? Is it the cover? The title? The pictures? The author? Was it a movie or show you saw? Is it the subject matter? So many possibilities. I was honored to be part of a compilation book last year. When the cover came out, I was a little taken aback. Judgement. What would people think? Would they be drawn to the deer lady? Would they buy the book as a favor to me? Would my friends and family read more than just my chapter? My own judgement became my self sabotage. I was reluctant to promote the book. Reluctant to get it into local bookstores. The cover doesn’t match the insides. The inside is filled with wonderful stories from beautiful women. It just didn’t match up for me.

This is our book cover.
This is the title of my chapter and the feeling I had while writing.

Maybe it’s because I often feel so different than what my outward appearance shows. Maybe it’s the words that trip me up. Rituals don’t have to be evil or bad. “Actions performed according to a prescribed order.” Many people have a morning or evening ritual – a way of doing things that either helps them get their day started or help them wind down.

I helped out at a Spirit expo last weekend. Over 600 people came to the event. Many walked past our booth. Few picked up my book. Zero book sales. Sure, I was disappointed, but I had a great experience on a rainy day. I will continue my journey and try to keep adding more joy. Joy in ways I hadn’t thought of or haven’t practiced frequently enough.

Peace be with you on your journey of enough. And if you’d like a book, I still have a few (wink wink). I’ll ship it to you and even include a recipe.

Why not?

You Tube. So many options. Want to learn how to grow tomatoes? There’s a You Tube video for that. Need to know how to change a tire? Yep, probably on You Tube. There are You Tubes for video games, for meditation tracts, for TV show bloopers, for cooking, and now our son has one also. Why not?

His take on a late night talk show started just two weeks ago, but the idea has been brewing for a while. He started watching Dude Perfect do stunts, watched gamers playing Minecraft & loved the SGN (Some Good News) channel that was popular during the pandemic. He’s always been a little dramatic, ever since he was a kid. This year, he got into the One Act play and loved it. His acting classes are some of his favorite. He came up with the idea for the channel on his own. He picked “The Unspecified Show” so he is able to adjust it as he goes. He designed his sign, re-painted the room, found the desk and chair, adjusted his set up and has two shows recorded. Of course, he is wearing a suit. He has plenty to chose from. He’s an old soul with a heart of gold. Will he become “You Tube Famous?” Why not?

How often do we dream of someday or what if? My son decided not to wait for “someday” and to take the plunge now. Try something new. Do something fun. Spread some joy and positivity. I admire him. It’s probably one of the strangest things about parenting – being in awe of your children as they become adults. For some reason, I wasn’t fully prepared for it, but it’s happened with both boys. Seeing them do something they love, that lights them up and makes their eyes sparkle – that’s true magic. It reminds me of the possibilities we have, but we often forget as we age. What would happen if we said, “Why not” a little more often?

I wish you peace on your journey of enough. Take a chance, try something new. Why not? Oh, and check out “The Unspecified Show” on You Tube. He’d love to get some more views and subscribers.

Hair cuts and finger sticks…

I’m not a good one for regular hair cuts – I’m more of a ‘one or two times per year’ kind of gal. I don’t have a hairdresser that I see on a regular basis. My method is usually, “I’m tired of this,” and I get it chopped short. Last week Monday was that day.

Recently, I had a doctor appointment with my primary care doctor. As I stepped on the scale, a new number came up on the screen. I weighed more than when I was pregnant. I’ve kind of avoided the scale at home. I’ve been less active due to vertigo and, let’s face it, it’s been a long cold winter. Stress and adjustments over the last 2 years have added up. Dr. ordered blood work before a CT scan. I hadn’t been fasting and had honestly had Oreos and milk before going there. So my blood sugar was high, but it was higher than it should have been, even though I wasn’t fasting. She ordered a follow up A1C, which gives a better view of longer term blood sugar levels. Mine was 6.9 and it should be below 5.7.

CT scan was fine. Set up a physical therapy appointment to help with vertigo (which it did). Diabetes nurse educator meeting was held and I got the blood sugar testing kit & a log for tracking food for the next two weeks. I had gestational diabetes with our second child, 16 years ago. The odds of me becoming Type 2 were higher because of that history, but being overweight and less active were bigger factors.

So, I chopped off my hair. Not to lose weight but because this is the beginning of change for me. A baker who now needs to watch sugar. Hmmm. That should be interesting. My drive to improve my health is strong, and hopefully that will get me on the right track. I’ve done food logs before and they make me kind of obsessed with it… not in a good way. I end up with very little grace for errors when it comes to the plan. I’m hard on myself and get bummed out at the idea of “lack/can’t/no.” It can be a bit of a roller coaster. It’s something you always need to be aware of – not really a day off or vacation from a lifestyle change.

So what have I changed in the last week? (aside from my hair being cut and no longer needing ponytail holders) I’ve been tracking my food & carbs. I’ve been intermittent fasting. I’ve been checking my blood sugar 2-3 times per day. I’ve been looking into lower sugar options. I’ve started to walk on the treadmill since my vertigo is getting better. I’ve gotten more veggies and fruits. I had 0 Peeps or Cadbury eggs this week!

What did I learn? Feeling out of control makes me crabby. I previously ate way more carbs than I knew. Sugar is hidden in lots of things. Sugar free options are very expensive. I can do intermittent fasting without impacting my blood sugar (everyone is different.) Plain black coffee tastes fine. Pre-measuring potions helps to avoid over-doing it. It takes your body a little while to adjust to changes. When I started checking my own fasting/morning blood sugar, I was at 200. The last 3 days, I’ve averaged 135. My target is 80-130. Not bad for a week.

Why am I sharing this? Accountability & awareness. Just another reminder that people deal with all kinds of things and we have no idea. I’ve found a Diabetes 101 Facebook group that’s been helpful with ideas and support. I will continue on this new journey and if I find some amazing low sugar baked treat that isn’t $20, I’ll let you know.

Peace be with you on your journey of enough. Make your day a sweet one, even without sugar.

Bicycle built for two…

Sometimes I need reminding, but we typically celebrate the anniversary of our proposal. I’m thankful to have a partner who is good about remembering (less thankful that he gives me a bad time when I forget.) 27 years ago, it was a rainy spring day, much like today. We had less snow compared to today. It was similarly gloomy and chilly. He had been working overnight shift and the morning show at the radio station. I was still in college and working at Red Lobster. He wanted to go for a bike ride. We often went for rides around Fargo/Moorhead, up to 20 miles or so at a time. I was crabby about it because I didn’t want to get wet and it was cold. We lived in the same apartment building. I had a basement studio and he was in the first floor.

I’m sure I grumbled something about going but I reluctantly got into some warm gear for biking in the rain. He opened the garage door, and there was a tandem bike. At first I was a little mad because we didn’t have the money for a bike. There was no person hiding to film the proposal. No Instagram post, no Snapchat story… just him and me in a crummy garage with no photo proof. He talked about being on separate paths and how he wanted to be on the journey together with me. (Hence the tandem bike) He pulled a ring box out of the bike bag and got down in one knee. Obviously, I said “yes.”

He had borrowed the bike and needed to return it. We weren’t going to ride in the rain. He told me to go in and call family/friends while he returned the bike, then we were going out for supper. There weren’t cell phones for texting or taking pictures and I couldn’t even reach everyone I wanted to tell. I changed clothes and met him downstairs. There was a limo with champagne waiting for us. He drove out to my parents’ house to share a toast with them. They already knew, since he had asked them before he asked me. Then we drove back to Fargo and ate supper at TGI Fridays, the same place we went on our first date. They used to have really good broccoli cheese soup and really thin onion rings. I’m sure I stared at the ring and probably told everyone I could.

I know I’ve told the story before, but I like to be reminded of how special and romantic it was. It’s one of those “core memories,” something that changes the course of your life. I knew him through 4-H. We didn’t start dating until after my freshman year. I balance out his “crazy,” and he makes sure I laugh more instead of being so serious. We have lots of inside jokes. We talk in movie quotes way too often. We spent 7 years together before we had kids. We traveled, did goofy stuff and had fun. We also went through hardships. In just three more years, our nest will be empty. Maybe we will get a tandem after all. (P.S. we did eventually try a tandem and it was not easy!)

I wish you peace on your journey of enough. I’d say yes again, I hope he would too!

Golden Rule…

I know when they talk about “the golden rule” they are not referring to a yellow or golden ruler. Instead, it’s referring to a Bible verse:

Matthew 7:12 So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.

Treat others how you would want to be treated. That’s the golden rule. Sometimes we get too self centered, or maybe it’s because we don’t always talk kindly of ourselves – either way, we forget the golden rule. Wish someone would ask you about your day? Try asking someone about theirs. Wish people spoke more kindly? Try being intentional about speaking kindly yourself. The summary of the verse: “Be kind.” Wouldn’t that be amazing?

I’m fully aware of the golden rule, but I don’t always follow it. I’m not perfect. I do know that when I’m more caring and considerate to others, I feel better myself. Giving makes me happy, but sometimes I forget to fill my own cup. We cannot pour from an empty cup. It isn’t selfish to fill your own cup. Sometimes we forget how. In the midst of the hustle and bustle of every day life, we forget what fills us up.

This past weekend, I spent 2 1/2 hours cutting up chicken (not my own birds!)… and that filled me up. What a strange thing, right? Two friends came up and we made a bunch of freezer meals for our friend. We decided since we had a big mess already, we’d make some for our own freezers too. And, cutting up chicken filled my cup. Not only will it provide meals for my friend’s family as she continues to heal, it will provide meals for my other friends and their families, as well as my own. We had recipes and assembly stations, freezer bags and bags/coolers of food. Coming from a manufacturing background, we had raw materials (chicken, beef, veggies, seasoning etc), semi finished goods (freezer meals ready to go), finished goods (key lime pie) and work instructions (recipes). We worked well together but we were exhausted at the end!

The golden rule. What did I appreciate when I was having treatment or recovering from surgery? Not having to worry about what/how to feed my family. So, I did for my friend what I was thankful was done for me. It doesn’t have to be a marathon food prep weekend – it can be a postcard, a call, a smile, a hug… do unto others. Be the change you wish to see in the world.

Peace be with you on your journey of enough. May you find what fills your cup so you can share that with others. Your act of kindness will be enough.

Snowballs on International Women’s Day

Tuesday is International Women’s Day and this Snowball reminds me of my mom. Not because she ate them all the time, but because I know she likes them, but they were a rare treat. Why didn’t she have them more often? Maybe because money was tight or because she would have rather have gotten a treat for the kids. Maybe she was just aware of the lack of nutrition value in them. I hope it wasn’t because she didn’t feel worthy of a treat. (Because she was and is – we all are!)

When I did a search on International Women’s Day, it says the first National Women’s Day was in 1909. I wonder if they thought we’d be in a different place 113 years later. I wonder where things will be 113 more years in the future. Hard to say. I can only hope that there will be more women leaders, that women will lift each other up instead of comparing or judging, they will wonder why there wasn’t equal pay way back then, and women will feel safe going for a jog alone or walking to the car at night.

On International Women’s Day, I’m helping to plan meals for a dear friend who is still hospitalized. (Something I should have done sooner but I didn’t want to be pushy.) She is in rehab still and even when she comes home, she has healing to do and strength to build back. Taking care of a few meals is the least I can do. They switched her to a gluten-free diet and it really helped her digestive issues. So we are pivoting for gluten-free ideas… freezer meals for a busy family. We have a cake place in our small mall – the company used to be at farmers markets with us so I want to support them. They have gluten-free cupcakes on their menu this weekend. We will bring one to our sweet friend (& hope her taste buds are doing well that day!) I’ll also make a gluten-free key lime pie since I know it’s a favorite of theirs.

This prompted a friend to say, “You have such a big heart.” People have said this to me before and I tend to dismiss it as no big deal. The thing is, this is not only my personality type, but also how I was brought up. My mom was and is, a very giving person. She would help out people at church, friends, neighbors, people she hardly knew. She’s not outgoing, she just has a giving heart. I grew up watching that. Then my oldest sister, who is a nurse, and nurturing by nature, modeled the same thing too. She is 9 years older than me so I was only 9 when she went off to college. While she was raising her own kids, I saw her doing the same thing our mom did – looking out for others. My other sister, a teacher, also nurturing, made sure to come to my track meets in high school to cheer me on. I was not a track star, but she made me feel special. She does so much for her grade school kids to make them feel extra special. I know she has the same giving heart too. I’m so thankful for them, and for all of the loving women in my life – aunts, cousins, friends & neighbors who helped to show me how to give to others.

Growing up with great female role models has shaped me into who I am. I don’t have a nurturing profession like my sisters. I’ve had to be firm and organized. I have worked mainly with men, and haven’t always been supported by my female coworkers. I’m not a perfect mom… I mess up, I lose my temper, I have regrets that I can’t undo… but hopefully I was/am the mom my boys need. Hopefully I’ve shown them that it’s ok to ask for help, and that it’s good to be able to help others.

I wish you peace on your journey of enough. I know it’s late on International Women’s Day, but maybe you’ll have a snowball tomorrow. Enjoy it!

March coming in like a … squirrel?

I think the March “In like a lion out like a lamb,” or “In like a lamb, out like a lion” is a little more accurate than the Groundhog day predictions. In the upper Midwest, there is almost always 6 more weeks of winter from early February (so Phil doesn’t know what he’s talking about). March weather tends to be a wildcard around ND/MN. We can have blizzards, sleet, rain, sun, clouds… all of the weather options tend to show up in March. The first day of March in central MN was sunny and near 30. “Lamb” type weather.

I think the whole month of March is probably going to be more like this black squirrel in my back yard. Erratic. He zoomed across the snow bank and went part way up the tree. Either he saw me and the black cat watching him or he decided he was going to find a hidden stash somewhere else. Maybe he smelled the scent of the 12 deer who have been living in our yard… I’m not sure. He zoomed off and we didn’t see him the rest of the day. My cat made a huff noise (like he was upset that he wasn’t squirrel chasing today,) and went back to finish his nap.

We may joke about feeing like a dog wanting to chase a squirrel, but my brain really does feel like that most days. I probably need to be tested for ADHD, but I’m not sure what that would change for me. I’ve been trying to do a mediation right away before I get out of bed – to ground me. I’m not sure if it’s made a difference in the spinning but it at least gives me twelve minutes of calm before I start my day. The rest of my day, my mind zips between work & what activities our son has & what’s for supper & what I need to add to the grocery list & what bills are due & work & the fact that I haven’t worked out & I should drink more water & when did I clean the cat box last & did I talk to our other son yet today & what can I do to support him & is my gas tank full & I should write a card to this person & work & I should really put away the laundry & what day is it & how much longer do I have to get my tax info together & what will we plant this summer in the garden & when will I paint the office & what’s the best direction to have my desk & I haven’t gotten up from my chair in a while & why do I feel guilty moving around just because I work from home & should I get rid of most of my clothes because I only wear sweats & I should text this person or call that person. Squirrel. Squirrel. Squirrel.

I could go on but you get the idea. I hear there are people who aren’t like this. I assumed it was normal. Some days I’d like a pause button for my racing mind. Someone suggested treating the passing thoughts like something you should put on a bookshelf. I’d need a giant book shelf. See, I started off talking about the weather and now here we are talking about squirrels and zooming thoughts. I have no advice. I’m not a therapist or an expert. I’m just a lady telling you you’re not alone. I probably won’t fix myself anytime soon. I will probably stay on my hamster wheel for a bit longer. But one day… one day I will step off of it and just stop. I’ll stand in the stillness and take a big breath then a step forward. Until then, I’ll dream of my somedays and my what ifs. I’ll make plans for the summer and I won’t put away my snow shovel until the end of May.

Peace be with you on your journey of enough. May your March be more like a lamb and less like a lion or a squirrel!

Same, but yoga pants…

I’m not a fancy gal. While I do like my nails painted, I’m too thrifty to have someone do it. In my 48 years on earth, I think I’ve had one or two manicures ever. I color my hair myself, which I know makes hairdressers cringe. Prior to the pandemic, not many people would have seen me in yoga pants unless I was doing actual yoga. Now I’m working from home and they are the attire of choice. Not seeing other people (aside from family) has me choosing comfort over fashion. (That and an extra x # of pounds.) It could be my age, or menopause or the events of the last several years, but I’m leaning more towards just being me. Oh sure, I’m still incredibly insecure, but I’ll wear my yoga pants anywhere I please now. And those friends who accept me “as is” are the friendships I value.

I recently read the book, “I’ll Be There (but I’ll be wearing sweatpants.)” I’m the same, but yoga pants. I highly recommend it. It’s easy to read, has stories from two ladies and tips or “things to do/what’s next” at the end of the chapters. It’s geared towards women. Sorry guys, but your whole idea of friendship is not really the same. I mean, feel free to read it if you want an insight into many women’s friendship struggles. I lost count of how many times, while reading this book, that I thought, “Holy cow… me too!” So many quirky things that I thought must be some strange trait, is actually more common than I could have ever guessed!

  • Trouble making friends? Not alone.
  • Still reliving friends from the past? Not alone.
  • Insecure when you walk into a room? Not alone.
  • Difficulty joining a friend group? Not alone.
  • Wonder what went wrong with a friendship? Not alone.
  • Wanting to be part of a group but afraid of rejection? Not alone.
  • Over-share or just not click with someone? Not alone.
  • Not invited to a group event when you thought you were part of the group? Not alone.

I could keep going, but you get the idea. Parts of the book had me time travel back… Back to 5th grade when a girl made our whole friend group turn on me because I wouldn’t give her my mashed potatoes at lunch. Back to when I was insulted at prom and didn’t realize it until many years later… (seniors willed the juniors things and many of them were code and either got by the admins or they just didn’t care.) Back to the time when I got a promotion and lost most of my friends as a result. Back to the time I had cancer and some of my friends disappeared completely, not once checking in.

But, it also made me super thankful for the friendships that I’ve held dear. Thankful for the times I went outside my comfort zone and met a bunch of ladies who believe in angels, fairies and signs from loved ones. Thankful for the friends I met while writing my first book. Thankful for the friends who met me in my mess and stress of graduation prep. Thankful for the friends I can text at 1am and the ones I can text at 6am. Thankful for the ones who send a postcard just because, who drop off flowers, or who want an honest answer when asking, “How are you doing?” Thankful for the friend who started out a neighbor and now knows me better than anyone.

Even those close friendships that I lost taught me something about myself. Do I wish I didn’t stress about what went wrong? Yes, of course. If you watch Ted Lasso, he says to “have the memory of a goldfish,” because they forget right away. I’m no goldfish. I remember the hand written notes, calling me names, shoved in my locker (because this was before cell phones.) I’m not a good fake friend. Sometimes my filter is gone. Sometimes I think I can trust someone, so I tell them a story and then I realize that was the wrong move. (I hear “abort mission” in my head as their eyes glaze over.)

So while I probably won’t try to small talk someone in the grocery store (for like 109 reason), I will take some of the other advice an tips from the authors. After I read the book, I sent texts to several friends. I have several more to do, but I’ll get there. Main take-aways: 1) Be honest 2) Put yourself out there 3) You’re not alone. Everyone has a mess of some kind. Mine might be my cluttered living room, but theirs might be something you don’t see.

As always, I wish you peace on your journey of enough. I’ll be there, but I’ll be wearing yoga pants and a funky ball cap. It’s ok to show off your crazy, I have plenty to go with it!

Same, but yoga pants…

I’m not a fancy gal. While I do like my nails painted, I’m too thrifty to have someone do it. In my 48 years on earth, I think I’ve had one or two manicures ever. I color my hair myself, which I know makes hairdressers cringe. Prior to the pandemic, not many people would have seen me in yoga pants unless I was doing actual yoga. Now I’m working from home and they are the attire of choice. Not seeing other people (aside from family) has me choosing comfort over fashion. (That and an extra x # of pounds.) It could be my age, or menopause or the events of the last several years, but I’m leaning more towards just being me. Oh sure, I’m still incredibly insecure, but I’ll wear my yoga pants anywhere I please now. And those friends who accept me “as is” are the friendships I value.

I recently read the book, “I’ll Be There (but I’ll be wearing sweatpants.)” I’m the same, but yoga pants. I highly recommend it. It’s easy to read, has stories from two ladies and tips or “things to do/what’s next” at the end of the chapters. It’s geared towards women. Sorry guys, but your whole idea of friendship is not really the same. I mean, feel free to read it if you want an insight into many women’s friendship struggles. I lost count of how many times, while reading this book, that I thought, “Holy cow… me too!” So many quirky things that I thought must be some strange trait, is actually more common than I could have ever guessed!

  • Trouble making friends? Not alone.
  • Still reliving friends from the past? Not alone.
  • Insecure when you walk into a room? Not alone.
  • Difficulty joining a friend group? Not alone.
  • Wonder what went wrong with a friendship? Not alone.
  • Wanting to be part of a group but afraid of rejection? Not alone.
  • Over-share or just not click with someone? Not alone.
  • Not invited to a group event when you thought you were part of the group? Not alone.

I could keep going, but you get the idea. Parts of the book had me time travel back… Back to 5th grade when a girl made our whole friend group turn on me because I wouldn’t give her my mashed potatoes at lunch. Back to when I was insulted at prom and didn’t realize it until many years later… (seniors willed the juniors things and many of them were code and either got by the admins or they just didn’t care.) Back to the time when I got a promotion and lost most of my friends as a result. Back to the time I had cancer and some of my friends disappeared completely, not once checking in.

But, it also made me super thankful for the friendships that I’ve held dear. Thankful for the times I went outside my comfort zone and met a bunch of ladies who believe in angels, fairies and signs from loved ones. Thankful for the friends I met while writing my first book. Thankful for the friends who met me in my mess and stress of graduation prep. Thankful for the friends I can text at 1am and the ones I can text at 6am. Thankful for the ones who send a postcard just because, who drop off flowers, or who want an honest answer when asking, “How are you doing?” Thankful for the friend who started out a neighbor and now knows me better than anyone.

Even those close friendships that I lost taught me something about myself. Do I wish I didn’t stress about what went wrong? Yes, of course. If you watch Ted Lasso, he says to “have the memory of a goldfish,” because they forget right away. I’m no goldfish. I remember the hand written notes, calling me names, shoved in my locker (because this was before cell phones.) I’m not a good fake friend. Sometimes my filter is gone. Sometimes I think I can trust someone, so I tell them a story and then I realize that was the wrong move. (I hear “abort mission” in my head as their eyes glaze over.)

So while I probably won’t try to small talk someone in the grocery store (for like 109 reason), I will take some of the other advice an tips from the authors. After I read the book, I sent texts to several friends. I have several more to do, but I’ll get there. Main take-aways: 1) Be honest 2) Put yourself out there 3) You’re not alone. Everyone has a mess of some kind. Mine might be my cluttered living room, but theirs might be something you don’t see.

As always, I wish you peace on your journey of enough. I’ll be there, but I’ll be wearing yoga pants and a funky ball cap. It’s ok to show off your crazy, I have plenty to go with it!

Grace like snow…

In MN, it seems like winter has overstayed its welcome. Since it’s only mid-February, I know we are a few months from spring. Heck, we’ve had snow in May, so it’s possible. When I saw this picture comparing grace to a snowfall, I thought it was a good analogy. Grace covering everything like snow… powerful image, isn’t it? Just like the snow not being able to avoid certain houses, grace doesn’t pick and choose.

The God I believe in shows grace to everyone. The God I believe in loves all of us because he created us. The God I believe in wants us to show grace to each other and to ourselves. Somewhere along the line, “love one another” became less important than being right. I picture God waiting, shaking his head a little, hoping we will embrace kindness and grace. He’s waiting for us to see the snow all around us. The grace.

It’s not just grace for me and my house, it’s grace for all. Grace for the teachers struggling to teach our kids without the support they need. Grace for the servers in the restaurant trying to make ends meet. Grace for the healthcare workers trying to save our loved ones. So many examples of people struggling, yet so many people just wanting to be right. We need grace. We need kindness. We need to smile at each other. We need to pause and listen to the answer after we ask, “How are you doing?” And we need to be willing to give an honest answer.

Over the last two years, we’ve lost friends, relatives, jobs, routines, safety and a sense of normalcy. Instead of trying to come together, people are just wanting to win the argument. This has my conflict avoidance mode on high alert and I just want the snowy grace instead. If you’ve experienced a snowfall without wind, it’s a beautiful thing. The air is crisp and calm and quiet. It’s what I envisioned when I saw this picture.

I am a bit of an open book in some aspects, yet I don’t like to create waves. I’m afraid of people attacking me for what I believe. But I’m tired. I’m tired of the middle of the road. I’m tired of the anger and fear and finger pointing. But can one person make a difference? Yes. One person can make a difference even to just one more person. Grace and peace to just one more person. Then it can ripple like waves on the water.

“Put your own mask on before assisting others.” They say it every time you fly. Same goes for grace. You must show grace and love to yourself or you cannot give it to others. That grace you show them might be what helps them through their day, through their shift, through their grief, through their illness. Less judging and more grace.

I wish you peace on your journey of enough. Peace like a new fallen snow, and when you see that snowfall, think of God’s grace.